How do I Improve my Child's Self Esteem?

From the day he is born, a child's self esteem is slowly developing. With the aid of his parents and siblings, he develops a sense of pride in his accomplishments. A child's self esteem is very fragile. As easily as it is developed, it can also be broken. There are several things you can do to help improve your child's sense of self worth.

Physical affection is one of the biggest confidence boosters for children. Children who are given lots of hugs, kisses and other forms of physical affection are confident that they are loved. All of these are signs, to a child, that he is worthy of affection.

Encourage your child to become involved with her community. It will give her a sense of belonging and help her feel that she is making a difference in her world. Talk to her about joining the Girl Scouts or other community organizations that strive to make a difference.

A child's self esteem can benefit from learning about his heritage and family background. This demonstrates to him that he is an individual with roots in society. Teach him about any traditions that your family may have. Show him pictures of his ancestors and share their stories. If you don't know your family's history, consider researching it on genealogical websites.


Like adults, children have emotions that need to be respected. Allow your child to tell you how something makes her feel. Let her know that, although you may not agree with it, you respect her emotions and feelings. Self esteem is boosted when the child knows that she is accepted for who she is.

Children are always facing new situations that may be difficult to handle. These problems range from arguments with friends, to being bullied at school. Although it may be tempting to fix all your child's problems for him, his self esteem will benefit if you let him work through them on his own. Offer him the guidance he needs, but step back and let him do the rest. If the situation gets out of hand, then it may be time for parental intervention.

Your child's sense of self worth can be greatly increased by giving her more responsibility at home. Daily chores makes a child feel like she has an influence in the day-to-day operations of the house. When assigning your child chores, give her flexibility to do them her way. Allow her to make decisions about the house as well, such as how to arrange her room or what color towels to hang in the bathroom.

Self esteem is all about feeling like you are an important member of society. For children, society is their family, school and peers. As a parent, you have the ability to give your child all the self esteem necessary to thrive in his society.


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Post 4

@Sunny27 - I think that it is important to keep your promises with your child. This will boost your child self esteem because they know that you are making them a priority.

I remember when my daughter was in first grade there was a little girl in the class that always appeared sad. One day we were having a class party and her mother promised that she would be there.

She was a busy owner of her own law firm so she rarely took time off. Needless to say, she did not show up and this little girl was devastated. This really sent a message to this little girl because her self esteem plummeted and she barely spoke the rest of the day.

Post 3

@Cupcake15 - Wow that is great. I also think that when we make a mistake it is important to apologize to our child so that they understand how valuable their feelings are to us.

Children are very forgiving and they learn that people do make mistakes and no one is perfect. They also learn the healing power of forgiving and realize that when they make a mistake they have to correct it by apologizing.

I also think that it is important to listen to what your children are saying and develop a daily dialogue so that you can stay connected to them. When I do this I find out who my children played with and what games they played.

It also lets me know if my child was mad at a friend and helps me to help them fix the situation.

Post 2

@Latte31 - That is fantastic. I do think that early wins like that as well as finding your child doing something right and building on it helps to foster healthy self esteem.

They also develop self confidence that will help them make better decisions when they get older. I think that a child that gets rewarded for developing responsible habits will continue the path and not get into trouble.

My kids automatically do their homework and the other day my daughter told me that she had to stay up to continue to study for a test. My daughter is only ten and I told her how proud I was of her.

Post 1

What I have done with my children is enrolled them in a supplemental math program since they were in kindergarten. My daughter is now in fourth grade and my son is now in second grade and they are both math aces.

This gives them such a sense of pride that they love to tell me how great they did at school and how they helped some of the other kids that did not understand the material.

It really builds their self esteem and they have a positive expectancy that they will get good grades at school. As a matter of fact, their boost in their self esteem has spilled over into other subjects and they are doing great in school and really love going to school every day.

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